Worry and Anxiety
Srila Prabhupada had gone to Hrishikesh in May 1977 to recuperate. However, after a sudden storm, his health deteriorated and he expressed a desire to be in Vrindavan.
A large group of devotees gathered around Srila Prabhupada at Krishna Balarama temple in Vrindavan. He began the address by saying, “If death has to come, let it come here.” Devotees cried, seeing Srila Prabhupada’s desire to leave his body. Srila Prabhupada reassured that this body has to one day go away and he has given us everything in his books. Srila Prabhupada’s grave presentation of the Krishna consciousness philosophy was a sobering reminder to devotees about their future duties in devotional life- Srila Prabhupada won’t always remain to physically guide them.
Although Srila Prabhupada encouraged devotees to understand the philosophy and depend on Krishna for everything, he personally cared for each devotee. He worried about their well-being. When Dr. Gosh, an old friend of Srila Prabhupada arrived in Vrindavan, from Prayag, he openly confessed that Srila Prabhupada was sick because he was taking anxieties for devotees; to this Srila Prabhupada concurred. During his final days, Srila Prabhupada asked if devotees were happy; he asked the cook Ayodhyapati prabhu, what the devotees were eating and how they felt. He called Tamal Krishna and the other GBC men and expressed worry that ISKCON properties were not safe, the trustees had not yet been designated, and the will was not notarized. When the needful was done and Srila Prabhupada was informed, he sighed relief and expressed, “Now I can leave peacefully.” While devotees were glad that they made Srila Prabhupada happy, he smiled and said, “Future directors of ISKCON ki Jai!”
Although in Vrindavan, Srila Prabhupada took anxiety for service to devotees. Many of us suffer from self-obsession; we constantly worry if our finances are all right, or if our relationships are good or even trifles like ‘I didn’t clear my stomach today morning’. Srila Prabhupada taught us by his example that we may not be able to do away with worry and anxiety. But we can take up others’ cause as a service and feel loved by Krishna in return. Kartik is a time when we begin the shift from self to others. That’s when Krishna enters our heart and makes us feel the anxiety is worth it!
